Dear Twitter, please stop asking me to make lists. I don't understand why I need them. I don't have the energy to find out why I need them. I only just about made it onto Twitter in the first place. Please just let me Tweet in my own basic way in peace.
Dear Facebook, please stop telling me to poke people. I'll poke who I want, when I want. And by the way, when did you become so irritating?
Dear Google, please stop with the Waving. If I want to wave at someone, I'll wait for the mail man and wave at him from my window in my pajamas, even if it does scare the living crap out of him. In the mean time I'm happy not waving. And what the hell is Waving anyway?
Dear makers of the Cadbury TV ad with the eyebrow twitching kids - what the hell were you thinking? I thought the days of cocaine inspired commercials were left behind in the nineties? I think my feelings on the absurdity of this ad may generate a whole other post. But really, it's a royal pain in the ass to have to switch channels every time my eyeballs are assaulted by this atrocity.
Dear Lost, hurry up and be on already.
Dear Firefox, why does everything seem so difficult with you? I ask you to do one simple web manoeuvre and you're all "Oh I don't feel like it today. I'm a bit under the weather. I think I'll just take a break and have a cup of cocoa". That's it. I've had it. I'm defecting to Safari.
Dear Apple, I still love you. Don't worry, I will never defect to the dark side.