Friday, October 15, 2010
Having two sons close together is so practical it's almost unreal.
Despite the crazy hard side of raising two small boys at the same time, we couldn't have planned it better. I'm beginning to see that now. Two sons, 19 months apart, the oldest still basically a baby when the youngest was born. Neither of them will remember a time before the other.
And we should be awarded some kind of environmental medal for all the materials we've saved. Clothes have been passed down (the boys are almost just one size apart now), toys shared, books divvied. Almost as soon as I'm placing a tub of Matthew's clothes into storage, I'm pulling it out again for Oliver. Matthew was only recently finished with his baby bouncer when his brother stepped in to use it.
Meals are easy because they eat the same foods, almost the same quantities too. Even playdates are are partaken together. Last month I bought new winter coats and simply picked up a matching pair (couldn't resist). I could write a book on the many ways two kids close in age are convenient.
Two boys are just right for us. A family of four. No need to upgrade our car to a minivan. One parent for each child. Not overwhelming for a babysitter. I'm back in my career, tasting independence in small doses.
It's a perfect scenario.
Yes, there's an "an yet".
There are occasions where I can't shake this tiny, nagging feeling that I might want to go and interrupt our nice, practical situation by having a third child. And it makes no sense whatsoever. And maybe what I'm experiencing is just a natural maternal yearning - the kind that will take place every single year for the next ten years no matter how many children I have. Perhaps.
When I think about the practical implications of a third child, I'm pretty sure I start grinding my teeth. Our house has three bedrooms. Our car only seats four. I want to be able to travel back to England to see my family (imagine that with three!). I want my career. I want a little bit of freedom from time to time.
In no uncertain terms, three would change everything. And yet... that completely impractical part of my brain - the one that purchases shoes beyond my budget and ignores letters because the magical fairies will take care of them - keeps gently nudging me, oh but another baby...
Dear impractical portion of brain: Shut up!
I wish I could say I'm finished having kids, and be content with it.
I wish I could remind myself of the many sleepless nights I've endured (still am) these last few years.
I wish I was more practical.
Posted by Lady Mama at 8:33 AM