Tuesday, March 8, 2011

When yor husband mistakes you for a ghost, you know it's time for a vacation. Or at least the self-tanning lotion.

One cold, dark night, I pretended to be a ghost in order to scare the living bejesus out of my husband.

Or at least that's what he'd tell you, if you were to ask.

His version of events go like this:

He came upstairs at 10:00 pm and found me asleep there. Not wanting to disturb me, he went back downstairs to continue fixing his computer thingamajigs. As part of my twisted plan to frighten the living daylights out of him, I crept down the stairs, mimicking the footsteps of our dog. And because of the dog-like creeping, he wasn't aware I'd come downstairs, instead thought it was the dog.

He continued working on his wires, completely unaware of my presence, still believing I was fast asleep. After a few minutes, he heard a voice muttering something in an eerie, unearthly way, to which he turned. He looked, first at our dog, wondering for a second whether the dog had, in fact, spoken. Then around the rest of the room. 

And then he saw it me, sitting there on the sofa, staring at him in my ghost-like way.

Which? Nuh-uh. I don't think so.

My version of events goes like this:

Yes I was in bed, but unable to sleep, and so decided to go back downstairs for a while. I walked downstairs in a very normal way (no creeping or dog-imitating). Seeing my husband crouched under the computer desk, clearly absorbed in his wire-fixing business, I entertained myself, folding blankets and shuffling cushions on the sofa. After a while, I asked, "What are you doing honey?", to which I'm almost certain he muttered something back, then carried on fixing.

I hovered around for a bit, waiting for him to finish. Then finally asked him, louder.

"What shall we watch?"

I watched as my husband turned to see where the eerie voice was coming from, a look of horror on his face as he scanned the room, before finally settling on me - the ghost.

Later, after he'd finished blaming me for trying to induce a coronary episode, we were able to laugh about it. (Especially the part about the talking dog)

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ModernMom said...

LOL Oh I am with you on the need for some sun and a bit of a tan! Hey maybe this explains why I keep scaring the cat:)

WhisperingWriter said...


I've mistaken the curtain for a ghost before. It looks really sinister in the dark, you see.

Nikosmommy said...

My hubs is always startling/scaring me (unintentionally) when he comes home late from work. He'll pop around the corner suddenly and I totally freak out. Of course he laughs and thinks I'm ridiculous...asking "who the heck else did you think it'd be???" I dunno, some crazy home intruder? Then he rolls his eyes and ignores me...

Slightly/Aubergine said...

You had me smiling after reading the title of this blog. So fun.

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

You are my sister! She is pretty darn pale too! He is lucky you were a ghost and not an ax murderer.

Anonymous said...

My hubby and I often hide around corners, behind couches and underneath beds to jump out at and scare each other at night when the kids are in bed!

Childish I know but so entertaning!

I love making him squeal like a little scared girl!

LisaDay said...

But are you vacationing?


Stephanie Faris said...

The talking dog part is hilarious!!!

I use Jergen's Natural Glow...but usually only in summertime. In the winter, I'm Casper!

If I Could Escape . . . said...

That's hilarious. From one pasty white mama to another, I can totally relate. =)

Edie Mindell said...

Sorry, but I can't stop laughing when I read your post. I always scare my husband at night, and I can just imagine your husband's horrified look.LOL. It's time for you to get a tan.:-)